i deserve national shit just because fucking Lady Luck favoured daddy's Y gametes.

fuck equality.

"My daughter has been the reason why I hung on to life, despite the pain. If she is there, she will say 'five more minutes Mum', and I am afraid I won't go ahead with it."

"They say pain is an annihilator and it is so true. It exhausts you to the point that you don't enjoy things anymore. Having been a nurse for many years, I know I am going to end up soon in coma with a colostomy bag. And that's not life."

"Pain or suffering is to be endured as long as there is a possibility of relief or cure. It is not to be endured when it is completely pointless, as is the case in the final stages of incurable disease."

"And I will miss twilight, when the light fades and tree and hills become shades of grey, then black."

"My life has been worth living, but not anymore. Now I want a peaceful death."

Farewell Angy.

Rae says that i've got a cow in the backyard.

She’s gone, for good.

A year ago, amidst our previous troubles, she came to us like an angel. She was adept at cooking, making the best pasta I’ve tasted. What came out from the kitchen was piping hot home-made goodness. She displayed sincerity and enthusiasm, never failing to greet us with a smile and heartwarming gestures.

Soon, she grew to be part of us. We’d share laughs and complaints; anything from the bad weather to the joys of baking. Her clumsiness was far shadowed by her diligence. That Christmas, we decided that to make her feel less homesick by letting her plan the dinner, while we slipped her present under the tree with all our other gifts. Her expression was priceless as she pulled out the stuffed toy from its wrapping. It seemed like we couldn’t have been blessed with a better maid.

Then as time passed, complacence crept into her routine; attrition was slowly working its way around her. She became less attentive to detail, tears started appearing in newly washed clothes, cups retained a layer of grime from her lack of care. She started to drift from her schedule, gradually waking up later, deviating from my parents’ orders.

*****

It’s been six months since I’ve smiled at her, every exchange between us were but polite acts. I chose to show her my displeasure for being rude to my mother by putting up a cold front whenever she tries to initiate conversation. Gradually, verbal contact ceased. I returned her greetings with a nod, while she reciprocates by doing everything in my presence in a hurry.

Then, a month ago, mummy told us that we could give her up for someone else. No information was to be released to her till an hour before her departure tonight. I wanted her to stay so badly, but I hated to have to rebuild our sour relationship. I wanted her to go off knowing the consequences of having taken us for granted.

Finally, her time with us was up. Tonight, her agent would pick her up before returning to the Philippines. My heart sank again, dreading this moment. And there she was as usual, washing the car before she took her dinner, unaware of the everything that was about to happen. A pang of guilt struck; I had all the power to stop this. I could’ve told my mum that I’d get her going again. I could’ve made her understand the gravity of the situation, I’m sure she’d change.

But again, I chose to withdraw. After taking a shower, I went to the living room in the guise of watching TV. I could hear her shouting, begging that she would work hard if we let her stay. She was evidently confused and shocked by the sudden eviction.

A long hour progressed. With the corner of my eye, I watched her pack. I wondered about her age for the first time. She could not be more than 25, yet she’s spent two years of her life in a foreign land slaving away. I shut myself from the torrents of pity that threatened to erupt.

Finally she emerged, bathed and packed. She looked to me and my brothers in a wide smile. “Thank you for making the time here so good to me,” she started, her voice breaking. My brothers muttered acknowledgements, but again, even at this moment, I chose to hold my silence. I gave her another curt nod.

I couldn’t tell if the disappointment in her eyes were from the thoughts of leaving us or for my lack of acknowledgement. Fifteen minutes and a lot of unappreciated television segments later, her agent led her away. While she walked out through the familiar door of our house the last time, I raced up to my parents’ room to get a clear view of her departure. Safe behind the protection of dark windows, I raised my hand for a final farewell. Oblivious to my gesture, she got into the agent’s van, and with a rousing fanfare of engine and smoke, she zoomed into the distance.

Goodbye Cora.

3 men had a meal together.
The bill came up to $25 altogether.
They contributed $10 each, amounting to $30.
Wanting to be tipped, the waiter returned with the $5 change in $1 coins.
Each customer took a $1 coin, leaving the waiter with the $2 tip.

Let's recall:
Each man paid $10 initially and was returned $1.
Therefore, each came up with $9.
Together, they paid $9 x 3 = $27.
The waiter was tipped $2.

Where is that remaining $1?

Some people can fucking make themselves comfortable in a PUBLIC reading room. Conveniently beside the powerpoints too.

(One day when i'm bored enough, i go around swapping their belongings and watch their reaction when they return to their "camps". )

victim of vicarious eviction by victoria.

Blühe, deutsches Vaterland.

I love my babies...